Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
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