ugly people sure do ruin things
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
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