so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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