week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
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