but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
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