u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
why do cheetos always look like penises
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
