I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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