The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
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One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
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Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
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