She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
