Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
