Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
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