sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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