Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I just cut my nipple shaving
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
