I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I forgot wine drunk hurts
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
