yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
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