Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Randomize
