he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize