Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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