The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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