I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize