WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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