We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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