I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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