We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
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