why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
