eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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