its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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