...so i touched it.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
wow bdsm is so cute
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
