how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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