I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize