suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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