Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize