So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
