I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
