If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
