I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
