Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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