U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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