He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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