I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
