so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
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