I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
