Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
