my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Randomize