help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
