Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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