i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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