this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Randomize
