Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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