I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
